A year ago.
A year ago I was fighting battles I thought mattered. Fighting for people I didn't think could fight for themselves. I was pressing against people who I thought knew better but who my gut told me were wrong. A year ago I was unsure. A year ago I knew there was something more than what I was doing, I knew there was something out there that was a much better fit. A year ago I was exhausted. I was worn out fighting an uphill battle to a summit I didn't really want to reach.
Everything has changed.
Ok, not everything. I am still exhausted but instead of feeling like I am fighting for every little step I feel like I am at the end of a long race with a little kick still in my stride. My confidence is night and day from where it was. I am finally on the path to what I want. Things are falling into place in a real and meaningful way. I am happy, with the perfection and imperfections in my life. I am not sure how this all happened. I am not confident that I could recreate this journey again. I do know it started with trusting myself. The day I decided that one part of my life was over was the day I could step into this. It also started with trusting the people around me. Having to rely on others has been a huge step. Looking forward it I know it is what will carry me.
I am happy.
I am content in the knowledge that I am almost through this first part of this short, sweet, and challenging program. I have exceptional people in my life who challenge me and who I learn from. I feel so lucky, everyday. I am so glad for all the decisions I have made in the last year that seemed like mistakes, mess-ups, false steps. From the outside I know I must have looked like I was floundering at times, like I had nothing figured out but I am starting to understand that those decisions made me who I am. Made me the person who is surrounded by exceptional people, who feels loved, who gets to be part of things that are remarkable. Where we are is where we are meant to me. I am meant to be here now.
A year ago I was fighting battles I thought mattered. Fighting for people I didn't think could fight for themselves. I was pressing against people who I thought knew better but who my gut told me were wrong. A year ago I was unsure. A year ago I knew there was something more than what I was doing, I knew there was something out there that was a much better fit. A year ago I was exhausted. I was worn out fighting an uphill battle to a summit I didn't really want to reach.
Everything has changed.
Ok, not everything. I am still exhausted but instead of feeling like I am fighting for every little step I feel like I am at the end of a long race with a little kick still in my stride. My confidence is night and day from where it was. I am finally on the path to what I want. Things are falling into place in a real and meaningful way. I am happy, with the perfection and imperfections in my life. I am not sure how this all happened. I am not confident that I could recreate this journey again. I do know it started with trusting myself. The day I decided that one part of my life was over was the day I could step into this. It also started with trusting the people around me. Having to rely on others has been a huge step. Looking forward it I know it is what will carry me.
I am happy.
I am content in the knowledge that I am almost through this first part of this short, sweet, and challenging program. I have exceptional people in my life who challenge me and who I learn from. I feel so lucky, everyday. I am so glad for all the decisions I have made in the last year that seemed like mistakes, mess-ups, false steps. From the outside I know I must have looked like I was floundering at times, like I had nothing figured out but I am starting to understand that those decisions made me who I am. Made me the person who is surrounded by exceptional people, who feels loved, who gets to be part of things that are remarkable. Where we are is where we are meant to me. I am meant to be here now.
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