Thursday, April 21, 2011

And my head told my heart let love grow, But my heart told my head this time no

My whole world fits in the back of a station wagon.

I thought I would be somewhere else at 25 (going on 26).  Maybe settled, maybe I own my own place, have furniture to fill it. Maybe I share this space with a handsome man, maybe a pup. Hopefully both. I would have a job that paid me handsomely, could afford warm vacations. I would be grown up. In contrast my whole world fits in the back of a station wagon. Yes, even my shoes and stretchy pants.

There is a beauty in being without floor, without ceiling. I may not be living the settled life, and I know some days I deeply wish I was, but owning things, compromising, cooperating, collaborating, there is time for that ( I hope!) and in the meantime I will be tire to road. Westward bound as my heart always is. It is harder to fling yourself to the wind when you are grounded. It is harder to be grounded when constantly chasing the salt air, tall trees, the pull of the ocean. Catch 22 I guess.

Maybe one day I will write " My world fits in the roots I have planted deep".



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